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OK. Time to get it over with. In and out. (pun intended). I'm hungry. I'm thirsty. And I'm already over all of these tests. With a new person in between my legs every few days, I'm going to start to get a reputation. Checking in, the receptionist addresses my boyfriend, "Sir? Are you her driver? And what's your relation?" "Uh, family." he cheerfully replies. Family? ......oh. Family <3 :) Of the very few things I'm never late for, doctor appointments is one of them. And it makes no damn sense why I prioritize those appointments to be the ones I'm on time for, because it is almost guaranteed they are never on time for me. So we sit in the waiting room and wait. And wait. And wait. "Missy," my name is called from behind another door and I don't bother looking around for psuedo Missy to come to the rescue. I'm so ready I practically dump my belongings onto the floor, rather than onto my boyfriends lap for safe keeping. Weight? Check. Height? Check. Make sure I didn't: eat past midnight? Check. Drink fluids less than 3 hours prior? Uh, I had coffee. Check Whew. No Jewelry? Check Not Pregnant? ....really? Check. :(. The nurse escorts me back to the room and I pretty much have my pants off and my stylish new paper gown on before she even has the door shut. Then I wait. And wait. Then they bring me my boyfriend, and we wait. And wait. Hanger Rising. FINALLY the doctor doing my procedure shows up and I hardly get out a "Hello" before I'm grilling him about his tardiness and inquiring if it was due to the fact that he decided to bring me lunch. He did not. So into another room I go. (Now, just to recap: the ultrasound went alright with the slight concern of either a cyst just outside the Fallopian tube (harmless) OR my Fallopian tube was dilated (he didn't elaborate, I didn't question. Dilated is good, right?! So this procedure will able to determine exactly what he saw). Physically, it was not as bad as I had anticipated. Initially, much like a pap and then a quick real sharp pinch. Tolerable, and was supposed to be the worst part of the whole ordeal. However, the dye wasn't able to flow freely into my right tube (the one in question), so there was an intense pressure build up behind the blockage that I could only relate to the feeling of having to go to the bathroom urgently (Like, explosive-crampy-sweaty kind of uncomfortable x5). Apparently, a dilated tube doesn't necessarily mean its open. A Hydrosalpinx is a distally blocked Fallopian tube filled with serous or clear fluid. The blocked tube may dilate and become substantially distended. The condition is often bilateral and the affected tubes may reach several centimeters in diameter. The blocked tubes cause infertility. IUDs (ding, ding, ding), endometriosis, and abdominal surgery sometimes are associated with the problem. As a reaction to injury, the body rushes inflammatory cells into the area, and inflammation and later healing result in loss of the fimbria and closure of the tube. These infections usually affect both Fallopian tubes, and although a hydrosalpinx can be one-sided, the other tube on the opposite side is often abnormal.As far as treatment goes, in the past patients with tubal infertility due to hydrosalpinx underwent tubal corrective surgery to open up the distally occluded end of the tubes and remove adhesions. Unfortunately, pregnancy rates tended to be low as the infection process often had permanently damaged the tubes, and in many cases hydrosalpinges and adhesions formed again. Further, ectopic pregnancy is a typical complication as well. There really isn't much available in the way of treatment, but pregnancy can still be achieved in the way of IVF. This wasn't terrible news since IVF is already the immediate option due to my ovarian reserve being so low. However, IVF patients with untreated hydrosalpinx have lower conception rates and it has been speculated that the tubal fluid that enters the endometrial cavity alters the local environment or affects the embryo in a detrimental way. Thus, many specialists advocate that prior to an IVF attempt, the hydrosalpinx should be corrected with a salpingectomy (surgical removal of the affected tube(s)) or even a hysterectomy with removal of the tubes, possibly ovaries. But! But, but, but, but there is a but! BUT, during the HSG procedure, the pressure behind the dye built up so much it did finally flow through, clearing the blockage that was there. Once cleared, the doctor said that everything is perfect; both tubes are open, my uterine cavity has no cysts, polyps, fibroids, etc,, and that everything is of right shape/size. Great. Thanks doc. By the way, you can forget about not having brought me lunch. After all of that, you owe me a steak dinner, sir. So, although there's a risk present that I may also have to have my tube(s) removed, doing so would only help my cause, not hurt it. AND, since the tube was unblocked via the fluid and didn't require surgical intervention, I'm hoping any damage done was so minimal and unlikely to cause a hostile environment, thus avoiding complete removal of the tube.  There is a lot to be hopeful for,
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 I had my first ultrasound with Dr. Deutch today.
Yes, Dr. Deutch. The name of my Vagina Doctor kind of looks and sounds like "douche'. The irony is not lost on me. As I sit in the waiting room, I glance over a few of the pamphlets that are strewn about: "Infertility and Stress: What you need to know" "Is adoption right for you?" "Childless by Choice" ...sigh... I turn my attention to the magazines on the coffee table in hopes of alleviating my rising anxiety.. Like, ALL of my attention and then some. I seriously organized and stacked every. single. magazine. And not just by name, but by issue date and then alphabetically I'm close to convinced I may almost certainly have anxiety induced O.C.D. I consider seeking out another kind of specialist. . Then I remember where I am and why, and I am pleasantly pleased to realize that there was not a single issue of "Parents" or "Baby" magazine. Well done, A.R.C. That's thinking ahead. And then I hear a newborn crying from behind the reception window. Are you flipping serious?! Why would somebody bring their baby to a gulldang fertility clinic?! I thought I was in a safe place. How dare she?? How dare she be so inconsiderate?! Ignorant Imbecile. And as my eyes started to well up with tears and I start to bust out the hats & horns for my own personal pity party, I witnessed to one of the most beautiful inspirations that my heart so desperately needed; the door exiting from the reception office and leading into waiting room opened, and out walked a lovely new mom who was clearly a previous patient- beaming from ear to ear with her pride and joy and hopes and dreams, no longer broken, but safely bundled up in her arms. How dare I be so inconsiderate? Moments ago I was judging this stranger, and now I hope to some day be just like her. #dothehumblehalt Another door opens and a woman pokes her head out. "Missy", she calls, and I look around the empty waiting room as if some other Missy is going to magically appear and relieve me from this reality. With no such luck, I gather my things and head back to the ultrasound room where I am instructed to undress from the waist down and wait for my doctor. As I reach down to pick up my bottoms from the floor, I swear I feel a spider scurry across my forearm. My fear is suddenly replaced with embarrassment as I realize there was no spider; I didn't shave. Damn. I knew I was forgetting something today. At least my socks are cute. As I sit, swinging my legs, I notice a giant jar of condoms on a counter within reach and I contemplate making balloon animals to bide my time. Nah, better stay away from them - they aren't exactly conducive to my end goal. My attention wanders to the machine beside me, already wearing one of those condoms on its less-than-impressive probe. What are all of these extra buttons? Focus. Well that's self-explanatory. Freeze. I hope that means still-frame. Depth. :snicker::giggle::snort: X-Beam. X-Beam?? Sounds like some sort of superhero ability. Now that's what I'm talking about. As I slowly start to reach my index finger into the proverbial cookie jar hoping to unleash the almighty power of the X-beam,, my mischievous behavior is interrupted with a knock. "Good morning doctor." I grin as I realize that I cant bring myself to say his humorous name. I wonder if he knows? He HAS to know. Anywho, some poking, prodding and lots of lube later, this was his conclusion: "Left ovary looks good. Appears to be dominant this cycle. Follicular count is low-normal. Right side appears to have a possible cyst outside of the Fallopian tube, OR it is possibly dilated. It's a good thing we are having the HSG done tomorrow." Oh joy. It's always so lovely to hear affirmation that any infertility procedure is necessary and indeed needed. #NOT But I was reassured, "If there is a cyst, it doesn't cause me any concern and it shouldn't for you either," and he went on to instruct me, "You need to be at Rockford Ambulatory Surgery Center by 11:15 a.m. tomorrow for your procedure with Dr. Holden. No solid food past midnight tonight. Clear liquids only up to 3 hours prior to procedure. No jewelry, valuables, and wear comfortable clothing. Also, you should have a driver with you. Once I am able to review the results, I will give you a call." As I dressed and gathered my things to leave, I had the same thought and concern (although in a much different context) that I've had after almost every first encounter with a man in-between my legs... I wonder when he's going to call me... |
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