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Phenomena Part III I just want to preface this once more with how incredibly uncomfortable I am sharing this. In the back of my mind I keep hearing those kid bullies on the playground, with their judgey arms crossed and eyes rolling into their head as they say, "You're just seeing signs because you're LOOKING for them. You wouldn't see them if you weren't WANTING them to appear." And I got to thinking....like, what's so wrong with that? Why you gotta say that like its some bad thing, tiny figment bully?! Of course I'm looking for them, and whether these are signs from the Universe, or signs pulled from deep within my (higher) self (really, its all one in the same, though - isn't it??), I consider it a blessing to be so in tune. And my reason for sharing my own phenomena is in hopes to encourage you to start noticing your own. Does it matter where these signs come from? You're either getting in touch with God, or you're getting in touch with yourself (really, its all one in the same, though - isn't it??). Pretty much a win/win. Sooooooooooo..............nener, nener figment bully. This morning as I was feeding my boys breakfast, I was reminded of a sweet lil girl from my past. My boys were sitting there babbling away in their jibber-jabber, and I was blown away by the thought that in just a few short months from where they are now, they could be putting short sentences together. I thought back to a video I had made of that sweet girl, documenting her growing up from just about the age of my boys now, to about 3-4 years old. At one point in my life I had watched that video over and over and over. I could hear her sweet voice turn from baby-babble to toddler-talk. Since that video was on my mind and we were going to see Grandma today, before I knew it, I was re-enacting one of our conversations out loud and my boys were thoroughly enjoying the performance. *** "Where we goin today?" ....tiny muttered whispers..... "Where?!" In a BIG girl voice, "GAMMA KISSY's!!!!" "Are you essssssited? What has she got for you?" "Pwesents fo me". "Presents for you?! Can you say "Hi Grandma Kissy!"?" She smiles adorably, and waves to the camera. "Im going to show her this - she's excited to see you! Are you excited to go?" Her big brown eyes light up and she nods vigorously. "Yea. I thought you'd be excited to see her." "Yea! And ummmmm..... my TITCHEN!!!" "Your kitchen?!?!" *** "We need to get YOU boys a BIG ol' kitchen! Maybe you can make ME homemade chickie nuggies." As I spooned another mouthful of creamy peanut butter oatmeal into my smiley child's face, I heard a noise from upstairs. "What the heck was that?" I brush it off. Mustve been the cat. Another spoonful dives into my other baby's face. "♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♪♪♫♫♫♪♪♪♫♫♫♪♫♪♫♪♫" Again I hear a noise, this time much louder. Much clearer. It was a familiar tune. Was that.....??? Could that be..??? Naaaaaah...... probably just the cat jumping on their toy or something..... "Ok boys, last bite" Again...... "♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♪♪♫♫♫♪♪♪♫♫♫♪♫♪♫♪♫" As the familiar tune plays once more, I look over to see the cat in question laying, oh-so-regally, no more than 10 feet away from me. What. The. Actual. French, toast?!.......it cant be..... So I look at my boys and say "shhhhhhhhhhhhh" as I motion a single finger up to my lips. I tip toe, ever so graciously, over the baby-gate and up the stairs. I turn the corner to look into their play room and when I do, there sitting in the middle of the floor was their tiny toy "titchen" that plays the tune I swear I've been hearing. I stared at it. And then I continued to stare at it. I lock eyes on this thing like we were playing The Staring Contest to end all staring contests. "I DOUBLE dog dare you." I mentally antagonize the toy kitchen to turn on again. I barely finished the "ou" in "you" when it loudly proclaimed the song of its people "♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♫♪♪♪♫♫♫♪♪♪♫♫♫♪♫♪♫♪♫" My mouth dropped open. "Alrighty then!" I said out loud as I quickly entered the playroom and turned off the tiny toy kitchen. "I dunno WTF message you're trying to get across, Spirit, but I appreciate the lack of subtlety." Now, obviously this is on my mind all day. Thank God this stuff doesnt spook me anymore, but rather gets me asking tons of questions. Like, Why? And, Why? Also, Why? Why? Why? Why? *** Later today, my husband came to pick up our sons and I contemplated telling him about my "crazy" phenomena. With the story on the tip of my tongue, out of the corner of my eye I noticed Leo had somehow gotten my cell phone and turned the screen on. At that exact moment I glanced over and saw the time 2:22 on the screen. "Hey buddy, gimme that" my husband said as he took my phone away. "Did that say 2:22??" I asked. He double checked, and confirmed. I decide to wait to share until I can look up Angel number 222.  I cant make this stuff up people. Well, I mean, I *could*, but really I'm much more creative than tiny toy titchen's terrorizing my thoughts with unprovoked tunes. I mean, see all that alliteration?! Mad creativity. Or perhaps I'm just mad. 
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Im baaaaack. Well, that was fast (that's what she said). Cripes, Missy. Anywho, so I made this unofficially official vow that I would start blogging more about Spiritualism as phenomena occurred in my life, and I received messages confirming that I totally should (as per my last blog). Buuuuuuuut, the thing is that I'm busy. And shy. Well, shy.ish (OK, I'm a total overshare-er and far from 'shy' per say, but putting it all out there still makes me crazy uncomfortable. Yet I do it anyway. Basically, I'm the most extroverted introvert you'll ever meet.)
So, I shared that blog post on Wednesday about Synchronicities and how there are no such things as "coincidences". And then I felt really uncomfortable. And anxious. And I wondered WTAF I got myself into. Do I realllllly have to keep this officially unofficial commitment to oversharing my Spiritualism?? And then I texted a friend that I haven't talked to in forever, in attempts to ignore my uncomfortable internal conundrum. Our conversation went like this: Me:  (***side note: we hardly actually ever converse anymore. We pretty much just send each other funny memes and have entire conversations with those) Friend: Hahahaha!!! Me: Humor! ^_^ Friend: How's life? Me: F*cking sweet. My babies are awesome. And hilarious. And sweet. My husband's a great father. And I have a mouth full of gummy worms. The Black Forest kind. F*ckin Pimpin. Lol How's engaged life?! When's the date? Friend: "...Im not too sure about the date I'm assuming its going to be 11/11 of some year. We have a lot of 11/11 things. Long story." *** Now the fact that we never really talk, but did this time stuck out to me. And the fact that she not only gave me an angel number of 11/11, but repeated the angel number 11/11 really jumped out at me. ZING - intuition bubbling. So, I looked it up.  What what whaaaaaaaaaat?! (Said it my best Sheila Broflovski voice ((you know, Kyle's mom from South Park))) But I decide to be stubborn about it. After all, I'm uncomfortable and trying to ignore my 'duty'. It was probably a message for her anyhow. Plus, is that reallllllly significant enough to anyone for me to blog about? I can feel the judgements now...."OoOooh, eleven eleven....impressive". *** Fast forward to the next day. Which was yesterday. We had our 12 month NICU follow-up for the boys where we met with Occupational Therapist, Physical Therapist, Speech Therapist, Audiologist, and two Neonatologists. It was a LONG effing day. An hour and a half each way, plus 3 hours for the appointments themselves. And since my babies are ridiculously adorable, Im just going to leave these pics from yesterday's adventure here
((btw, they are doing amazing and meeting milestones for their actual age and AHEAD for their corrected age. These dudes are my heroes <3 <3 ))And on our loooooooong car ride back home, the damn Eleven Eleven is nagging me. Was that really a message for me? Am I seriously supposed to blog about this? Cant you one-up it Spirit, and give me something CRYSTAL clear?! I wonder how many people have even looked at that blog anyway... and I go to check my phone to look to see if anyone has really given my blog two bats of an eyelash to see this...  Yea, thats 1:11 p.m. with an 11% batterySo, here I am to tell you all about it.
Ask and you shall receive. Try it for yourself. Hi friends ^_^ So, last month I wrote this blog as an open letter to my sons. It was kinda rushed, last minute, and I just let the words fly out of my mouth. The point of the blog was to share some words of wisdom with my children - that they already know everything they will ever need to know - they just need to learn to remember. In that blog, I referenced an occasion where I was able to recognize this 'knowing' with hindsight. *** Excerpt *** "I didn't know that I knew, but looking back I know I knew all along, ya know? I'll explain. About 5-6 years ago I found this teeny tiny pair of pink sunglasses. I stuck them in the sun visor of my Monte Carlo. You know what I said to myself when I put them there? "These are for the daughter I will never have". Now, when you take into consideration that I had NO idea that I was infertile (or at least, I did not consciously know), and that I hadn't even had any signs of things askew with my girly monthly thing yet ("Ewwwww, mooooooom. gross!" I know. Bear with me boys) it seems like a really oddball thing for me to do. But somehow, I knew. Something deep inside me already knew." *** Fast forward exactly two weeks. My mom keeps bringing me boxes of my old sentimentals that I've been storing at her house for, like, pretty much ever. I've been going through them, tossing and keeping what I see fit, and then giving back to her stuff to sell. This particular day as she was leaving she said, "Don't forget about your boxes! I think you'll really enjoy going through the white ones." And something inside me went "DING!" I didn't even really realize that it did at the time that it happened, but it did. Within an hour or two I made my way down to our family room and thought "Oh shoot! I forgot to grab one of those boxes to go through. I wonder what's in there for me?? There is DEFINITELY something special for me to see." And I was excited. I literally felt excitement. I went upstairs and eyed the 3 boxes that sat waiting for me to explore. I was immediately drawn to one. I took it downstairs and felt like a kid on Christmas morning. I opened the box and BAM, right there, right on the top....  I know right?! "Crazy". I was so surprised I had to take a picture. Now mind you, my mother has no idea that theses glasses are of significance to me (She hadnt read my blog either. I have IP trackers on the activity to my website, so I know this as a matter of fact). She probably thought Id be excited about all that old jewelry ;) And I have not even thought about these in God-only-knows-how-long. Let alone haven't seen them in God-only-knows-how-much-longer, but here they are, right on top, in a box that I felt compelled to look at first, after being told that Id enjoy going through them. After that feeling. After that knowing. Confirmation. This is the universe speaking to me. Infinite Intelligence speaking to me. God speaking to me. Me speaking to me. I have yet to decipher what the message is. For now, I'd like to accept that it was just a lil test game to sharpen my intuition skills. *** Fast forward some more. These damn pink glasses are weighing on my mind and I feel like I should blog about them. I just feel the need to blog in general. On our way home from Church this past Sunday I say to my husband, "I'm thinking about starting a new blog. Or revamping my old one. I don't know. I feel like I'm supposed to write and I need to revolve it more around Spiritualism." And that was the end of that conversation. I blog occasionally, but I don't post them anymore or really share them with anyone, plus its extra work on my plate, so there wasn't much to really carry on about. I had an urge, I shared it, and I let it go. I thought, "Meh. The Universe will guide me." Yesterday, I received this text from my friend at church.  Sooo.....yea. There's that.
Some may just write these things off as a coincidence. I, personally, know better. I mean, what are the odds?! REALLY. What. Are. The. Odds??????? They are too great. Or too little? In any case, the odds, or lack thereof, are significant enough for me to consider it Divine Intervention rather than just a coincidence. The moment I accepted the fact that there are NO COINCIDENCES, my life changed. Ive learned to trust my gut. My intuition. The voice inside of me that is and somehow isnt my own. Ive tested the Universe time and again and it always talks back. Learning this brought me to my boys. Without a doubt in my mind, heart, and soul. And I want you to know this. I want you to try it for yourself. I want you to KNOW your connection to Source. So here I am, spewing words and sharing my "minuscule", although personal and meaningful, synchronicities with you, simply because the Universe gave me the green light. Yes, I know I'm risking looking like a loonytoon. But it doesnt matter to me, because I trust the Universe. Now its your turn. Test it. Trust it. Enjoy it. |
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